Skip to content

Category: editing

Preliminary Adventures with the Devil Box – Intelligence, Artificial and Otherwise

BIG NEWS!

My new novel, Fester Descent, is available now in paperback, eBook and audiobook.

Cover for Fester Descent
Fester Descent

This is the sequel to fan-favorite Fester, set twenty years after the events of the first book:

Twenty years after Fester, the town is still running on inertia and bad decisions. Everyone assumes things will work themselves out. They never do.

Bolly Bollinger is trying to keep his father’s auto shop afloat while the town’s last old-money family keeps raising the rent. His stress relief is a local tradition known as a “zoo run.” He roars past the Schmidt mansion at top speed, flips off history, and pretends that counts as control. One night, the response is a gunshot. Bolly survives, but the consequences don’t stop there.

When Candy Troutman—an informant at Mike’s Place, Fester’s notorious brothel—is found murdered in her bathtub, Chief Constable Martin Prieboy moves to contain the damage. He wants answers quickly, order restored, and the town reassured. Instead, he gets a case that resists simplicity and rewards the wrong assumptions.

As the investigation tightens, Fester looks elsewhere. A failing shopping mall stumbles into viral fame after a Fourth of July Fun Fair triggers supposed hauntings and an influx of ghost hunters. The events may even involve a long-dead Native American. No one agrees. Everyone has an opinion.

Meanwhile, a volatile heir to a dying dynasty retreats into weapons, paranoia, and his three pet monkeys. A disgraced former chief isolates himself with a Vietnam-era tank. The town keeps moving, convinced that spectacle counts as progress.

Caught between economic pressure, civic certainty, and a system that refuses to slow down, Bolly and Martin find themselves on opposite sides of momentum that no longer cares who gets crushed. Fester Descent is a darkly comic crime novel about small-town justice, institutional stubbornness, and the comfort of bad answers. Savage, satirical, and escalating with gleeful inevitability, it proves that in Fester, the truth isn’t hidden—it’s just less entertaining than the alternative.

The Devil Box

How about that description? Did you like it or dislike it? More importantly, did it make you want to buy and read the book?

I’ve been very leery of AI for a long time. Anything that made Stephen Hawking nervous seemed a good thing to approach with extreme caution. Therefore, I was never particularly interested in finding out much about it. Sure, people on my social media feeds were posting all manner of interesting images, animations and music. There was a time – and it doesn’t seem like it was that long ago, but it probably was – that I would have been all over those toys. But the older I get, the more of the ornery Luddite comes out in me. Perhaps it because, having experienced it from inception to now, I can see how the promise of the internet devolved to a rage-click disinformation engine. Rant! Rave! Kinds these days! With their hair and their music! Etc.

Of course, my attitude softened when it became apparent I could use ChatGPT to help me with something I really dislike doing: marketing my own novels. Specifically, coming up with blurbs for Amazon and other advertising platforms. This is like pulling teeth, and most authors I know despise it. How do you encapsulate a 100,000-word story that you’ve spent months if not years laboring over, and condense it into two paragraphs? And do so in a way that will help twig Amazon’s algorithms and quickly engage the interest of potential readers? Usually, it’s a numb slog of writing and re-writing the same hundred words – a dreary task at best.

My wife had been using ChatGPT to help her job search, so the Devil Box had already gained admission to the household noosphere. She had been having good success in crafting resumes and cover letters. As anyone who has searched for a job in the last decade or so would know, the trick is getting past the resume-screening algorithms and get your credentials in front of a person. Use an algorithm to beat an algorithm – seems like a fair trade.

It wasn’t too far of a hop to figure that ChatGPT should be able to help get a leg up on the Amazon algorithms as well, so I fed in the text for the back-cover blurb I had already written, as well as the major plot points of the story that I thought would pique a reader’s interest. It took a little bit of massaging, but I eventually came up with the little gem you see above. Time will tell whether the Devil Box will actually help me sell more books.

There’s more to be said on the use of AI in writing, but I think that can wait for another post. Right now, I’m way into Larry McMurtry’s Streets of Laredo, and want to get to the end of that puppy.


Just a Few More Minor Edits…

I’m in the home stretch to get Fester Descent edited and proofread ahead of the February 28 release date. It’s always a weird time during the revision of a book – trying to balance the desire to publish the best possible story with the fact that I’m sick unto death of reading it. The image above represents perhaps the fifth or sixth copy I’ve revised since the “final” draft was written.

I’ve also had a lot of good input, including from my wife NancyAnne and my Aunt Claudia who have graciously read the book with a sharp eye for spelling and punctuation errors – of which there is no shortage. I’m stiff finding plenty of errors as well. Most of those tabs are actually cutting the fat – removing excess and repetitive verbiage. Of which there is no shortage.

Now comes the most odious part of preparing the launch of a book – the marketing. Time to dive back into the sewer of algorithm necromancy and keyword conjuration. Also, I’ll be looking for beta readers, so if you’re interested, please drop me a line at crawford@sweetweaselwords.com.


Laughingstock
Sure, why not?

Holiday Greetings and Cover Reveal

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and all similarly-oriented seasonal greetings. I hope that everyone has had an enjoyable holiday season and can find some time to rest, relax and generally get themselves ready for whatever 2026 is going to throw at us.

One thing coming at us in 2026 is my new novel Fester Descent, which is tentatively slated to be released at the end of February. I finished up the first draft of the MS earlier this year. Some timing miscues resulted in me sitting on it longer than I had intended, mainly because I had waited too long to get on the editor’s schedule. It was worth the wait to work with Paula Guran, though. She had edited the original Fester, and I learned a lot in the process. I was glad to be able to work with her again. I’ve spent most of the holiday so far reviewing her edits and getting the MS typeset. Now, it’s review time, where I read and re-read the novel to the point here I start to hate it.

But enough of that sorry action – here’s something much more interesting: the final cover design! I’ve actually beein sitting on this for over a month, but I wanted to wait until the MS came back from the editor and I had a clear idea of when the book will be available (2/28/26).

Here it is. Simple, but – I hope – intriguing. Who wouldn’t want to know what’s going on in a book with a tank, a monkey and a sexy leg on the cover?

Cover for Fester Descent
Fester Descent cover

Happy rest of your holidays and a propitious New Year. Hang on to your hat – hang on to your hope!


Prepare to Descend

Snip of cover for Fester Descent

Greeting from “war-torn” Portland! I will forgo the tempting political editorializing and get right to the point: I’m done with Fester Descent.

For now.

I finished with the third draft, and was contemplating a fourth. The idea didn’t really appeal – I had been immersed in the story for months, and needed a break. So I decided that three drafts was enough, and I could let the editor deal with the mess as it was.

Unfortunately, I had dragged my feet a bit in getting on the editor’s calendar, so she won’t be able to get started on it for a few more weeks. It’s well worth the wait, I think. Her name is Paula Guran, and she did the editing on the original Fester. I would have loved to have had her on Laughingstock. She hadn’t been available, and I’d had to go with an unknown quantity – with predictable results. However, with the delay, the book will probably not be available until early in 2026.

Things are good and the cover is nearly complete. A teaser is included above. After I’m done procrastinating (any week now), I intend to pick up the thread of Dungeon & Dragon, and see if I can bring that story to some nonsensical conclusion. New chapters soon!

Maybe.


Fester
Read the sensation that started it all!

A Knotty Problem of Timing

After getting off to a slow start, I finally got up a bit of momentum on the second draft of my latest project. After re-writing one of the early chapters, it was pretty much just picking up the redlines I had marked up the Shitty First Draft – easy stuff. Then my timeline came back to haunt me.

I had learned about the importance of having an accurate timeline from Paula Guran, who edited Fester. She was merciless in addressing the timeline, among other things. (Shame she wasn’t available for Laughingstock, which was an editing nightmare.) I hope she’ll be available to edit Fester Descent.

But just in case, I’ve been keeping a tight timeline as I’m working through the second draft. This is where I pay for the sins of the SFD. Timing issues are just one of many sins, but arguably the most problematic. And as I learned with Fester, you don’t want these problems to linger too long or they, um, fester.

So I’m jumping on it right now, at my earliest convenience. (No point in worrying about it during the SFD; that’s all about getting words on paper.) When cranking on the SFD, I was only worried about the sequence, not the timing. I just knew that event A came before event B, and to hell with the details. Now I’m dealing with situations where a character gets shot, but his wife doesn’t visit him in the hospital for five days. Oops! Gotta fix that.

It’s a knot, I think – and it pays to un-knot the story as quickly as possible. You can sometimes shove the knot down the rope a bit, but you sure don’t want to shove it all the way to the end – because it gets begger the further you shove it.

I think I’ve worked the knot metaphor for about as much as I can. Best to call it good right here. More news to follow as I finish up Draft 2 and start to think about showing it to an editor. I can hardly wait.


Now for Round 2

After nearly two months, I’ve finally gotten through “editing” the Shitty First Draft of my latest MS, working title Fester Descent. Now, when I say “editing,” I really mean reading and redlining the text, and making notes for the next draft.

Frankly, it’s a little embarrassing that it took me so long to read through my own first draft. A nasty part of my mind tells me that a real writer would have gotten through the whole thing in a weekend.

In my defense, I have three good excuses as to the dilatory nature of my review:

  • I find it difficult reading my own writing, especially for extended periods
  • I had a whopper of a spring cold in May that sidelined me for nearly three weeks
  • I am monumentally lazy

However, now I’ve finished my review and now I have to write the Slightly Less Shitty Second Draft (SLSSD). Okay, I merely have to take a big breath and just start doing it.

Easier said than done, of course.

There is one thing that will make it a little easier: for a first draft, it’s not that bad. You never know what you’ll end up with at the end of a first draft, especially if you’re a pantser like I am. Usually, I end up with a large number of loose ends that have to be tied up, sometimes awkwardly. With this draft, that wasn’t so much of a problem. (OK, yeah, so I had to resort to a deux ex machina in the form of an Air National Guard F-16, but other than that…) Maybe it’s luck or maybe some small portion of accumulated skill, but it seems like things came together a lot more easily on this one.

That having been said, there is still a lot of polishing that needs to be done. Time to get down to it. Then sell some plasma so I can hire and editor.


Laughingstock
Order now! Operators are standing by!

Another Brick in the Wall of Voodoo: SFD

I’ve discovered something about finishing the first draft of a novel: nobody really gives a rip but the writer. Which is understandable. For starters, nobody’s going to get to read it. There are only a handful of people who read any of my pre-publication manuscripts. The rest of you aren’t missing anything, believe me.

Nevertheless, I was mighty glad to be done with the Shitty First Draft (SFD) of my next novel. For starters, I finished it in less than a year, which is an amazing record for me, since I am essentially very lazy, and it usually takes me a long time to write anything. I fully credit this relatively fast writing time to my participation last year in National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo. This was great, as it allowed me to add 66,000 words to the MS in 30 days – a word count that normally would have taken my five or six months to produce with my normal glacial pace.

I had been meaning to participate in NaNoWriMo for years, and was glad that I actually took the plunge and did it in 2024, because it was recently announced that NaNoWriMo has gone bankrupt. A sad and sorry end to a 25-year-old institution whose laudable goal was to get authors to put words on pages. So long, NaNoWriMo.

The upside is that I now have a new MS brick to edit. I didn’t get started on revising it right away, however. First, I went back and reread Fester, as this is a sequel. Good thing I did, too – I had forgotten a number of important details of the original story that have an impact on the new one. The biggest was my faulty recollection that Billy Snyder had gone to prison following the shenanigans of Fester, when in fact he had used his J. Edgar Hoover-esque collection of intel and political dirt to keep his butt out of lockup.

Overall, I’m pretty well pleased with how the SFD came out. Usually, the end of the MS is a little chaotic at first, due primarily to my pantsing style of writing. This time, however, things resolved themselves with a relatively low level of chaos as I tried to weave the disparate story lines together. Despite – or perhaps because of – the mad rush of NaNoWriMo, the S-level is relatively low in this SFD. I think that with one more draft, I wouldn’t be embarrassed to show this to an editor.

Hot New Item! Audiobooks!

This just happened recently – all of my books are now available as audio books. People have been asking after this for years, but I have demurred. Mainly, I didn’t have the time or the interest or the money. It can be expensive to produce an audio book – especially if the other formats don’t sell that well. Sometimes people ask, “Why don’t you narrate it yourself? You have a good voice.” I do indeed have a face made for radio, but these folks grossly underestimate how much time is involved in recording – and especially editing – an audio file. My rule of thumb is that it takes eight times as long to prepare a presentation such as this as the length of the presentation. That is to say, if the recorded audio book runs ten hours, it would require eighty hours to record and properly edit. That’s a lot of extra work to snag extra sales that would net me enough each month to perhaps buy a 2-pack of Hot Pockets. If they were on sale. So, no thanks.

However, Amazon has made it easy now. They have a computer-generated narration tool that sounds pretty decent, and only takes a few minutes to convert the text to an audio file. Best of all – it’s free! Of course, it involves AI – something that I have been loath to involve myself with, but this was just too good to pass up. I tried it out on Laughingstock and it sounded pretty good, so I pulled the trigger and created audio versions of all my books. See below for an example.


Buy now on Audible.com!

Sickness Now, the Hours Dread

Q: Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?

A: To make up for a lousy summer.

-some kids’ magazine from the 70’s

Well, if I’m to follow in Mr. Dumpty’s footsteps, I’m due for an awesome fall – because this summer was, in fact, rather sucky.

July was okay, just hectic – but in August, things went downhill in a hurry. In early August I had stomach surgery, which is all well and good. At first, the recovery went great. They sent me home with a large bottle of opiated syrup, and that was just fine. However, about a week and a half after the surgery I got hit with a GI bug, and it cleaned my clock. I’ll spare you the gory details, but it was a strong and persistent bug that laid me quite low for five freakin’ weeks. It wasn’t just nasty, it was dag nasty.

I didn’t make a big deal of this on social media, partly because I don’t like sharing personal details online*. Also, I didn’t want to unduly worry my legion of insanely-devoted fans, at least until I felt I was out of the woods. I’m sure I spared many rendings of garments, not to mention much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Naturally, my writing suffered. I did get some feedback expressing the expectation that I was doing wonderful writing during my recuperation. There are two reasons for this: initially, large bottle of opiated syrup; then, 24-7 vomit-o-rama. Neither is conducive to authorial motivation. Robert Louis Stevenson may have written wonders from his sick bed, but I was either giggling at the cracks in the ceiling or clutching my spasming belly and moaning piteously.

It was a bit of a chore to finally shake the rust of and get back down to writing the sequel to Fester. I managed to fake my way through a few writers’ groups with chapters I had already completed before the surgery. Soon enough, I had to get cranking again. It was tough at first, but pretty soon the thoughts began to outpace the fingers and the word count continued to ratchet up.

I’ve gotten to the point now where I’m developing new characters – or rather, they’re developing themselves. The characters from the original book have already revealed their personalities to me, but these three new Schmidts (Ronald, Ophelia and Thelma Louise) are just starting to become more than cardboard cutouts, which is always fascinating to experience. Of course, there’s plenty of fun in seeing what the old characters are up to. For example, Billy Snyder is working on a restoration project that is really batshit crazy.

Enough for now. I don’t want to give too much away – especially since it might all change by Draft 2. Suffice to say that I’m well on my way to recovery and cranking on the word count.

*I’m only sharing this info here because I’m pretty sure hardly anyone will read it.


Coming Soon (Sorta) and Other Miscellany

ITEM! It’s official! Work has begun on the sequel to Fester. Granted, it’s not a lot of work, and there is no title as of yet. As I am a pantser when it comes to writing, I don’t even have a clear idea of exactly what’s going to happen. There are a number of things I can share of which I am fairly certain:

  • The timeline of the new story is set 20 years after Fester, which puts it around 2014.
  • Martin Prieboy is still Chief Constable of Fester, but is struggling with the recent loss of his spouse.
  • Billy Snyder is out of prison and living in a secluded house in the hills, where he spends his time plotting revenge.
  • Michael “Bolly” Bollinger has taken over his dad’s automotive repair shop and is a respected local businessman -but his business is in trouble.
  • The Schmidt family now teeters on the brink of destruction, their huge mansion looming over the town of Fester like something really, really symbolic.
  • Cynthia Hoegenbloeven is still running around somewhere with the remnants of the money she ran off with. Presumably she has now gotten some clothes.

There are other characters who we probably won’t see: the Plummer family moved out of town shortly after the events of Fester, and haven’t been heard from, ditto Janie Simpson. Roscoe Dirkschneider has died in prison, and Randall “Cowboy Bob” Warnke never recovered from his injuries sustained at the hands of the parishioners of Calvary Lutheran. Of course, the Top Hat families are still around, although most of the characters from Fester have gone to that Great Country Club in the Sky.

That’s what I’ve got for now. I’ll keep you posted as the story develops, although it usually takes me several years to actually write, edit and publish these books. You patience will be rewarded.

ITEM! In the course of marketing Laughingstock, I had the fortune to encounter a new book promo site called Shepherd. It’s a fascinating premise: authors are asked to list their five favorite books related to a theme of their choosing – which is presumably related to one of their own books. Then they write a short review of those books.

The theme I chose was “hilarious high weirdness,” which is a fairly regular theme in my writing. This allowed my literary eclecticism to really stretch – it was a great deal of fun! Here are the books I chose:

  • Wilt by Tom Sharpe
  • Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson
  • The Book of the SubGenius by the SubGenius Foundation
  • Noir by Christopher Moore
  • The Third Policeman by Flann O’Brien

My reviews can be found at THIS LINK. Give the page – and the whole site – a good going-over – it’s a lot of fun!

ITEM! There will be an eBook promo for Fester, starting this Wednesday, June 5, running through Sunday, June 9. For this time, the eBook version of Fester will be available for a measly $0.99. Of course, it’s still too early to promote the sequel (coming Summer 2027 if I really work at it), but I wanted to take another run at the Amazon Bestseller ranking as I did with Laughingstock. I’ve pretty much come to the conclusion that these promos are the best way to get people to read what I’ve written, and that investing heavily in advertising profits nobody but the advertising platform. We’ll see how it goes!

Countdown to Publication

Counting down now – just seven days until the release of Laughingstock. For once, I’m not spending the weekend re-reading a hard-copy proof, so I thought I’d give a quick update/preview.

For the last four weeks, I’d been following pretty much the same routine: receive a copy of the proof from KDP on Friday, spend Friday night, all of Saturday and Sunday morning reviewing the MS for issues, and entering the changes on Sunday afternoon. This would allow just enough time to order a new proof in time for it to arrive the following Friday.

Most of the changes were for clarity: avoiding repeated words or finding more elegant ways of expressing ideas. However, I did (and continue to) find plenty of typos. This chafed my ass worse than snowpants with the seat cut out, since I paid both an editor and a proofreader to review the text. They both totally phoned it in, and I will not be working with either again. The kicker is that the editor I’d really wanted to work with originally contacted me several weeks ago to let me know that she was freelancing again. So it goes…

I’ve been trying to front-load my promotional efforts more than I have in the past. I’ve been trying to get some advance readers to generate early reviews. I’ve used the traditional method of pestering friends, family members and my not-particularly-extensive email list to read and review Advance Reader Copies (ARCs).

I’ve also been using a service called BookSirens. This is a service that provides ARCs to readers for free, with the notion that they will leave reviews for the books they have read. It’s free for the readers, and fairly reasonable for authors. Setup fee is $10, and for each reader who downloads a copy, the author is charged $2. So, for $20 you could end up getting 10 reviews. Compare that to sending out hard copies and badgering your friends and family to actually read it and provide a review. So, far, I’ve gotten three four-star or higher reviews. A pretty good deal, overall.

I’m also getting ready for an Amazon advertising blitz – provided I have any money left over after the tax bill is due. I’m brushing off the painfully-won knowledge of this incredibly complex advertising platform to boost sales as soon as it’s available. Which, by the way, it will be on

Sunday, March 31 – Laughingstock Release Date!

I’m also thinking about a promotional “launch” a few weeks after the official publication date. I’ll be running promos on BookBub at least, and maybe one or two other platforms. (PRO TIP: I’ll be dropping the price of the Laughingstock ebook to $0.99 for about a week starting ~April 15.)

I’m sure there will be other frantic, last-minute, chicken-with-its-head-cut-off activity in the next week as well. I’ll be sure to let you know all about it soon! In the meantime, I’ve still tried to keep producing words with my serial Dungeon & Dragon – be sure to check it out.